Rating: 1/5 Stars (One star)
Star Cast: Mustafa Burmawalla, Kiara Advani, Ronit Roy, Supriya Karnik
Director: Abbas Burmawalla, Mustan Burmawalla
What’s Good: Its unintentionally funny nature. You will get ample of things to laugh on, be it Mustafa’s shirts with pigeons or the cringeworthy dialogues.
What’s Bad: Everything is pretty much messed up with this film, from casting to music to screenplay.
Loo Break: Let’s just say you’ll have to challenge yourself to take maximum loo breaks in 2 hrs 20 mins.
Watch or Not?: Buy yourself a good Happy meal instead of a ticket for this film. Machine’s cinematic brilliance is limited to being an entertainer for a nightout with friends, that also has lots of booze.
Sarah Thapar (Kiara Advani) is a racer who participates in the ‘Ultimate racer challenge’ and in spite of being one of the best, gets beaten by Ransh (sounds like lunch at many places! – Mustafa Burmawala).
Ransh and Sarah are in the same college and in no time, the duo start to have feelings for one another. After receiving surprise gifts from an anonymous lover, Sarah plans to meet her secret admirer at a bridge. In an unfortunate accident near the bridge, her admirer Aditya (Eshan Shankar) is killed by a speeding car. Sarah moves on over the sorrow of losing her friend and soon gets hitched with Ransh, after her dad (Ronit Roy) agrees of him.
A major twist awaits Sarah post marriage and her world is about to change. After finding a major secret about Ransh, what will Sarah do?
Will she seek revenge from her true love?
Machine Review: Script Analysis
I’m kind of in splits here, just thinking about ‘analysing’ the script of Machine. Did they have one in the first place or they just chose to put every 90s cliche and make a ‘garibon ka Baazigar’ instead?
Yes, Machine is highly inspired from Abbas Mustan’s own popular, hit film Baazigar. What’s ironic is, why would they ruin their best work and make it so unsaleable.
Everything about Machine is wrong, right from the assumption that heart is the only machine that feels. Let’s just forget how the brain sends signals to sensory organs should we?
Keeping aside that, Machine is typically a Abbas-Mustan affair with deaths, plot twists, speeding cars and fancy locations passed off as ‘North India’.
Sarah’s character is straight from the 90s when girls didn’t find the whole secret admirer thing creepy. How is she in love with a person who sends her a letter written with his blood in this time and age is beyond my understanding. Also, once again how wrongly, stalking is shown to be a form of wooing is shown shamelessly. Because logic is not expected, don’t even ask how Sarah and Ransh get married without even passing college.
In spite of the story being laden with twists, there’s hardly anything gripping about it.
Dialogues are extremely cringeworthy, like “Main Tumhari Lipstick Zaroor Kharab Karunga, Par Tumhara Kajal Nahi” or “First love burns the brightest”. Most of them are popular Facebook posts and its just sad how they are passed off as movie dialogues.
With an overstretched climax and yawnsome back story to Ransh’s character, you’re left waiting for this film to come to an end.
Machine Review: Star Performance
Abbas’ son Mustafa debuts with this film and sadly just like the film’s title, he’s equally mechanical in his act. He can’t dance, can’t mouth his dialogues well and that work out body does no wonders.
Another debutante in the film is Eshan Shanker and I’d just prefer to speak less about him. He hardly makes an impression and may have to reconsider another career option.
Kiara Advani is seen flaunting flowy outfits and batting her eyelids as the damsel. She shows no growth as an actress in her third film and would probably be best if she sticks to cameos instead of lead roles.
Ronit Roy and Johnny Lever are a saving grace as the only two people in the film who can act.
Model Carla Dennis too makes a debut and she manages to look smoking hot, that’s all.
Machine Review: Direction, Music
Abbas Mustan – the director duo who are known for their thriller genre films in Bollywood, try to pass off an old wine in a new bottle with this one. They take inspiration from their own work and it no where fits right apart from a few scenes.
The racing portions have been captured well and we have to agree their choice of cars is impeccable. Heck I would even admit, the cars look better than the actors!
One of the most key elements required for thrillers is pace and that’s where Machine fails miserably. It drags and drags and drags, leaving you highly disinterested by the end.
The picturesque locales are impressive and once again, a case where the background and production design hold your attention more than the cast.
There are too many songs in the film and not one is entertaining enough. Old tracks, Ek Chatur Naar and Tu Cheez Badi Hai Mast are revamped terribly by Tanishk Bagchi and the way they are shot is even worse.
Machine Review: The Last Word
Machine is for machines – who can’t think! So if you’re brain-dead enough catch this film! 1 star for cars, locations and supporting cast!
Machine releases on 17th March, 2017.
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